If that is,

Happy happy CNY

2012-01-28T03:06:00.000+08:00

Happiness shared amongst everyone. <3

Hiiiiiiiii I had a fun time during CNY! Went visiting with NPvoices at Laoshi's house. She's the nicest choir conductor everrrrrrrrrrr :) So hospitable! I love hanging around with happy people. My girls!!! In schl, more than half the time spent are with guys. Pretty used to it though! Rowdy and cheeky and.... sick. My "knowledge" gna increase extravagantly. However, I gotta love everyone around me although they might be mean2me sometimes but they'll help me most of the time sooooooooo no complains! I miss having my girls around though. Guys can be pretty insensitive at times and I can never have any h2h w them hahaaaaaaa.

Worn out but worth it.

2012-01-15T03:41:00.001+08:00

HI! So I haven't been blogging much 'cos I thought my life's pretty much the same. But still, everyday's happenings pretty diff though. Don't know how to put it. Oh yes, one word to put it, HAPPY. That sums up my everyday, at least 70% of it. :) So, the rest of the 30% is just shitty and not worth the thought. Anyw, I can't think of any shitty stuffs soooooo its gd! It's not (so) shitty afterall! *gleams*

Usually my day wld be like

1) Home > Schl (duh?) > Out > Home
2) Home > Schl > Choir > Out > Home
3) Home >Schl > Home
4) Home > Out > Home

On average, I'm stepping home EARLIEST like 8PM. Wtf right? The rest like 10AM-2AM then I'd be back home. SO tired..... I stay out of home and get so sick of being out of it sometimes haha COS ITS JUST SO TIRING. Schl everyday is like shyttttt. People-wise is awesome (OFC LA), that's why I'm always 70% happy!!!!!! Friends play so much of an impt role, SEE. K can haha.

RETARDED CLASSMATES UPZ!!

Choir's sectionals' practice

SUPPER!!!

Mommykinz :))

Actsocute hahaha

SOP1s :)

Some of these pics aren't on FB but the rest, FB FTW.

Its a new year!

2012-01-03T09:07:00.001+08:00

Hi man! Having mixed feelings abt 2012 but I'm just gna try my best to stay positive and keep that positive energy running on V-power;) Actually now, I don't rly rmbr how my 2011 went but the later part of it was aweeeeesomeeeee. Oh ya actually 2011 was pretty gd, start of my poly life, just remembered LOL oops STM!!

Cutesies;)

2011-12-31T17:39:00.002+08:00

HI BRO<3

What working life brings

2011-12-20T04:19:00.001+08:00

Some people might say working life is boring or tiring etc and I don't deny that but for me, I added on alot of FUN to my worklife back then hahaha. Only part-time for less than 6mths for a few jobs but it definitely felt rly good meeting all the new faces. Come to think of it, it was about this time, last year when I just barely finished O's and was looking for jobs. Typical O lvl student hahahaha. I must say it was a good experience to have tried out retail and telemarketing jobs?

1st was the telemarketing job which my brothers, ChengHan and I went. One of Disney Channel's Prize giveaway projects at a company called Antasis, located @ Redhill. Hitting "quotas" and competing with one another to get the most calls etc haha gosh those were the days... & we worked w many adults too :)

2nd job was with my brothers again haha. Dad's friend got us a job in the IMM Event hall as the salesperson of sports brands, Puma Nike etc. IMM was in the west??? Totally out of the way since we lived in the East but we went anyw hahahaha.

3rd job was totally at GUESS but under 2 segments. First I went to interview at the company FJ Benjamin and got accepted as a part-timer at GUESS paragon outlet. I worked with all the adults who were rly nice and crazy fun too!!! Unexpected much? Haha coooooool. Gg for lunch breaks, restocking and sleeping in storeroom LOL idk what else I did when I was a newbie in the retail line man haha!

Then there was this ma-hassive Guess bazaar sales which came up and I was asked if I wanted to go for it. I called Adeline to join me hehe. & she got to know my best two GUESS part timers Waynn and Christine. First bazaar was at the Isetan scotts downstairs 2-lvls event hall. We played and took alot of pics w the rest of the parttimers (lz to list down their names but i do rmbr all of them!! :))) Alot of cartons & restockings to do was all I rmbr tho haha. TIRING.

Then after this bazaar, we shifted up to the lvl 3, 4 or 5 (I cant rmbr) small event hall at Shaw Isetan scotts. Lesser parttimers but got to know this awesome funny cpl XuanQi and HanWei. Turn out most of the parttimers like Adeline became schlmates at TP while I got to meet back my longlost friend I knew from OutwardBound(OBS) who came to NP too hah!! What a small world, I know!

Well it was undeniably the most fun and busiest period I spent but I also earned quite alot too. I still rmbr all of these Ex-colleagues of mine from all these pics and we do keep in touch in fb & twitter. Not as often but at least not bad alr haha. It's rly hard to match each others' schedule to plan a meetup so tough that I can die haha!! Take Today for an instance, I also went out w my GUESS bazaar Ex-colleagues! Many cldn't make it but I still enjoyed their company :) Hilarious & humourous bunch who can tolerate my nonsense haha.

Blog abt this outing again some other day I guess? Anyw all these pics can be found of fb haha. FB is awesome in SOME ways.

What I can say is, working really bring alot of collective memories and experiences that we can nvr imagine it'll bring and I encourage everyone to go try out part-time work. BUT RMBR to have +ve energy & attitude. W/o them, you can never have as much fun nor experience in work cos you only end up offending ppl or wtv not...... HAHAHA yknw why I say that? 'cos even though I made my working life sound as EGGCITING as it may sound like, it has its bad times too. Some ppl may be a tad more hard to get along with and all that. No one/ Nthg is perfect, it's just how we wanna make "perfection" come as close as it can get. O lvl students shld all go get a job!!!! :))

A shoutout so loud.

2011-12-14T22:54:00.001+08:00

Family is love.

2011-12-12T13:44:00.001+08:00

Even if you know it or not, I will always be here for you. Not physically, but morally rooting for you. I don't show it, but I do. I love you all with all my heart and I can never imagine what it'll be like if you guys wld ever leave me. You all might not be the best but needless2say, they're my bestest family I've ever got. Never perfect and wouldn't be, but I love you. We're a family like that. ❤

Diet & CT(s).

2011-12-05T00:29:00.002+08:00

I just read these and just felt like sharing. Might help? Healthier way to diet even! Need to lighten yourself or slim down for CNY?! Yesssssss, you don't need, I NEED IT DESPERATELY. S.O.S!! Srsly feeding myself too much till the point of no return. I've never weighed so heavy in my life. Best is, I NEVER GREW ANY TALLER. So shuddup. I'm not fat, nor am I skinny. I'm not just nice either. I WNA BE SLIMMER.

Read this "101 tips to lose weight". Before you even put anything/ snacks into your mouth, open this up. Before you even read half of it, you lose your appetite. Haha!! K I was exaggerating but... srsly? 101 tips?!

I shall (TRY) to live by this quote.

"Rule for diet week.

If it is a fruit or a vegetable you may eat it,

if it is not a fruit, vegetable or one of the meats,

then you may not eat it."

Well, as for having sufficient sleep, I foresee myself having lack of sleep due to Common tests coming up in exactly a wk. Wish me luck! (For both, diet & exams)

<3 <3 <3

Ciao! :)

SOE Christmas Event

2011-12-02T23:49:00.001+08:00

It's SOE's Christmas event and Maryanne and Felicia dragged me to join them cos we haven't met for quite some time!! That's how bz we are ): schl is tedious. Btw, I'm not gna change course nor schl alr. I guess engineering is srsly a steady platform.... despite all it's complicating and tough modules. I'm gna pull thru' this!!! :)) Friends and classmates to help me, what's to fear right? I think.... Hahahahahahha 😊

Celebrities

2011-11-29T22:21:00.001+08:00

These are the Kpop groups/ singers/ dancers I enjoy watching/ listening to :) One of the more popular ones except JayPark.. I guess he's not AS "hot" on list as compared as the rest haha. He's more into English thingy lately. Still like you tho hehe >:)

(Favourite characters: Chuck & Blair from Gossip Girls)

Chuck's real name is "Ed Westwick" & Blair's "Leighton Meester"

& then I've been watching these dramas like Vampire Diaries, Gossip girls and HK's (idk what title but its abt sushi etc) hahaha. Love the guy inside (the cheerful one). Humorous and cheerful ppl are really very good to be around with. :) These are artists that I can think of now. Maybe alot more but they didn't exactly came to my mind just yet haha. STUDY TIME!! Break's more than enough already!

P/S Mnet Asia Music Awards(MAMA) was entertaining and interesting :)) Twitter timeline was exploding hahaha awww.

Silly thoughts.

2011-11-27T22:46:00.001+08:00

Yknow I've always envied other happy families who seem to live a really happy life. Then, I'd envy other families who've gr8 financial abilities, who're able to indulge and immerse in awesome lives. Well, that's the poor sulky side of me who envied so many other ppl! People who're wealthier, "happier", prettier... Ppl who are so much more remarkable than I am! However, upon self-realization and after alot of self-reflection, I find myself rly disgraceful. How can I ever compare myself, or rather, my family amongst the rest?

I should, instead, start to appreciate things and my family even more. What they've given me and whatever things that those ppl who I've envied can never ever have given, obviously. How foolish am I to thought in sucha... Stereotyped way? Hence, I must start to remind myself every single day, no matter how painstakingly, I'd tell myself to appreciate the people around, the world & the things, everything a little more. 'cos my world can be much envied by the rest. Whom, I think should not be like me, receding from reality.

Facing reality, wld be very much like, accepting the fact that things are like this, and to appreciate what's given, presented to us and more. Then, happiness would come and awful expectations would go away like it shouldn't have ever existed.

Ok my vocab srsly last warning. Hahaha but not like I want to!! >:( 😒

My twin brothers' 16th.

2011-11-23T01:47:00.002+08:00

First of all, Happy birthday you 2!! Had a pre-bday "celebration" on Sunday. Awesome crabs and other dishes. Just ironed-on some initials & cute stuffs for my brothers on their Baggu bags. Idk why but I decided to preorder Baggu from my EBM senior's blog 2 wks ago haha.

Then since everyone's having a baggu (from everywhere I see in sch), I went to buy "fabric stickers" to personalize 'em! Not v ex also. I hope you guys like your present k:) Alws love you both, dearly altho you guys may be a nuisance at times. ❤

(pics not in order & all taken by phone)

Life of a GPA, barely 2, poor student.

2011-11-20T00:48:00.001+08:00

Supposedly meeting Jinren for lunch today but b4 I left to meet him, parents suddenly said wna have lunch so I abandoned him and ate a sumptuous lunch w my fam❤Happygirl:) It takes just a lil to make me happy, effortlessly haha. Dad then sent me to MarineParade library which I then met Junwei and JR. Which means, study plan failed cos it became a chatting session instead! Sigh. Ltr had dinner w mum and jr hahahahha bestie is just damn (act) shy. He can talk alot w my naggy mum mayb cos... He's naggy himself!!!

I got my fav bk alr, "Memoirs of A Geisha". Loving it as much as how i love Hello Kitty:) I had one back then but I lost it to a friend during pri6 (yes, I still rmbr)

Btw ive been rather vexed lately. A part of me wants to change course but I'd hafta waste 1 year of time and money spent on engineering... I love the company but not the modules. Math as Physics and Circuits, I rly find it hard coping w 'em, Arch enemies since young. However, even if I change to retail mgt at TP, I might not get in or I might not like that course again then how?! Engineering is rly a better sturdy career tho. I guess on final note, I'll still hafta go back and try my best to befriend my enemies once again. Sigh sad life.

2011-11-15T00:57:00.001+08:00

Hi people!! (if there is any) I'm gna post abt the wonderful day I had w my babes last Saturday:) Mizah, Adeline & Brenda! Paid a little visit at Brenda's Hse heh. Caught 11/11/11 the movie on Funshion b4 S'pore theaters even have it on run haha cool or what. The movie is a tad better than Paranormal Activity3 but nah, I don't like such "horror" movies. It's more like Satanic movies can! Btw I'm trying out blogging w the blogger's app on iPhone hahahhaa srsly this is one reason why I've never regretted getting an iPhone, than a BB. No wonder the world's so inclined to Apple ah. Awesome technology:)

Adeline baked Oreo cheesecake & muffin. Looks good for home-baked delights right?! It was delightful;) We were all supposed to bring a "homemade own-cooked" food but apparently I screwed up my Tutu kueh (which I initially wanted to make) and Mizah went to get her super ex DSLR hahaha. Speaking of this, I rly rly wna get a "mini-DSLR" or wtv you call it. The smaller version of DSLR. Anybody wna intro me a good and cheap one?! Preferably Nikon or Canon haha. So sick of my Nikon & fujifilm digital cams. ):<

The night b4, I wanted to make tangyuen(glutinous rice ball desserts) but in the end I changed my mind hahahhaha mum said I cook damn lousy. Idk why but since my F&N days, my food wld alws look good but taste bad TSK. K wtv, gn!! :))

Glutton4lyfe!!!

2011-11-06T00:09:00.001+08:00

Seize the day

It has been pretty eventful, schl and friends' wise haha:) I shall list the "happenings" in pt. forms!

-NPvoices, Choir & Acapella concert
-Stayovers @ Schl loft.
-Caught Paranormal Activity 3 w Angel, Boon & Pop.
-Had dinner with 1P01, sem1 lovely mates <3 (Perry's bday)
-EBM Halloween event
-Ke Qin's bday + Halloween celebration
-Gg out w mum (trying to spend more time w her)
-Collecting of pay. ($.$)
-Fell ill & went to visit a doctor

These are just the outlines of it. Sounds rly happening huh? Except the "fell ill" part.. It's not eventful but it's kept me feeling like shittttttt for almost a wk. Anyway, I haven't been touching my ukulele ever since schl started 3 wks back cos 3 wks of schl is just TEDIOUS. I'm alr quite lost.... Idk if I'm even able to pass Common Test which is coming up really soon. )':

I need to put in more tremendous effort to pull up my GPA. I barely got a 2...... K this is really bad, I know. Don't judge tho! Studies has always been a prick4me. Sigh slap myself really really hard. I needa hit the Library more often. I just CAN'T study for nuts @ home. I'd just be.... too distracted. However, I've been pretty happy with life despite all the depressing moments.. hahaha live life the cheery way~ :))

Ciao!!

2011-10-23T19:15:00.002+08:00

First week of schl

HELLO there :) Schl has been okay... But to a certain extent. At some lessons, I'm desperately lost. Imagine if I left it till the last few weeks b4 tests again then how?! Die alr hahaha. So this time I'm NEVER gna leave it till THAT last minute. Srsly cannot stand myself. How in the world can a girl like me to be so lz?!! It's not smth new to those who've known me for years though. HAHA OOPS!

First day in the week was COMISS. It's on writing and Public speech. This module is like a mix of ppl from different courses I think but I saw 3 familiar faces in the first class hehe lucky. But gone case, my language has been damn bad 'cos of all those abbreviations and nonsense talking/ conversations. No usage of proper English at all, I'm gna suffer big time ):<

Following days of the week I met up these ppl for lunch and whatever nonsense stuffs haha! My sem 1 mates & "cliques" in NP :)))

I met-up w my SIS and LUV at Parkway ytd. Sista and me did my brows but his brows still as THICK -.- He didn't want the woman to thread too much. & he went like "ssssstttttt" when the woman thread his brows hahahahah funny sia!!! & AngelLuv got her new haircolour. Nice siaaaaa but can't rly see in the pic. Lighter shade of brown. Totally look like Korean haha!

& I've been going Choir!!! Aiya I don't rly take pics in choir also idk why. Think like too busy practicing hahahaha act only~ NPvoices having an upcoming concert this Saturday @ NP's Music Box. I'm trying to sell tickets but quite hard ah!! $7/ticket. I srsly dno who else to call! Oh well.

Gna end off w a siaozhabor picture hahahhahahahahah!!!

On side note, I think my hair rly damn maggi.... However, I still don't regret perming my hair :))

2011-10-16T02:03:00.003+08:00

Another Amazing day

Hey there! After a whole day out to Sentosa & Toning till morning, I'm so bushed!!! I went out like 10+AM and came home like 8+AM the next morning. Celebrated LiKhoon & Darren's Bday while I met up w this whole bunch! ( & yes, I CURLED MY HAIR!!!)

We played Volleyball & some games on the "football" space. Tiring haha!

This pic kinda took up some time cos those ppl at the background kept swimming from place to place hahhahaha I'm damn boliao but it's fun to do it w Adeline!! I took one for her too hahaha. Hers was better than mine cos I'm a better phographer :) HAHA KIDDING. Cus those ppl weren't moving that much whn I was holding onto the camera. I'm quite an unlucky gurl you see ): Hahahahahah!

(A picture b4 everyone left)

That day we had Chicken rice @ vivo for lunch but it didn't taste rly good. Dinner was better! Pizzahut :) & some cake cutting!

After all these, I went over to Clarke Quay. Waited for this "woman" for very long... Bloody MAXChewKeQin!!! hahahaha. We waited for him for nearly 1 hr 45 mins I think! but we were smart! After waiting for half an hour at Raffles place, we went over to Timbre to continue waiting. The atmosphere & ambience was gr8! With ppl around & bands playing nice songsssss. WOO! I don't mind going again! Next time i'm gna go with my girls instead!! But Ytd I went w my best guy friends so okay la hahahaha. :)))

Our drinks!! Mine was okay but shawn's one was baaaad. Taste of mint & colgate ewww!!! hahahaah. Iman took non-alcoholic drinks that were not bad tho!! Then we left for ECP by taxi which, I called Angel down for macs and walk-walk hehe. We had funnnnn, rly! hahaha.

& a picture before everyone left for home after "watching sunrise" haha. I forced them to take this 'cos the guys were quite reluctant to take it haha as usual!

So that's the end of my happening Friday. I spent the whole Saturday at home and I think I shld sleep soon. 2AM alr! Tmrw gna go make new lenses heh yay clearer eyesight!! Nights all :)

2011-10-10T03:40:00.001+08:00

Hi!! So I celebrated my bday w my sec schl mates @ ECP last week on 3rd Oct hehe. Walked all the way to lagoon and found out that it's closed for renovation for smth.... We got so agitated hahahaha. It was more lika' land expedition, felt more like it! Well it was a happy "reunion"!! :) Bdays are meant to be spent happily right? Then last Friday I went Plaza Sing w Ade. Shopped @ Daiso & ate lunch+gongcha;). Then had to rush to Choir. NPvoices has a bunch of pleasant ppl (like me HAHAHAHA kidding) Rly like singing w them, laoshi and our pianist. :) However, I rly hafta be less lz. Laziness ALWAYS stops me from going for CCA. Guilty!!!

Well joined choir since Pri 3+ man. Till now I still think Choir's a good CCA. But srsly I'm damn lousy. Till now I haven't picked up reading notes. GEEZ FAIL man!!

2011-10-01T01:13:00.000+08:00

Class chalet @ Aloha Changi~

Oh hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii long time no blog heh. Kinda ran out of pictures to blog ahah. Went Class chalet on a Tues hehe. IT WAS FANTASTIC. My first stayover at a chalet w my friends! Quite special to have it with my NP mates hehe. Half of the rest in my class couldn't make it tho ): Nvm, its their loss.... HAHA kidding! It's like... so fast a semester has passed and im glad to have met such an awesome bunch :))) They've srsly helped me alot in class. They'll always render help to me man. Tsk touched!!!

However, we'd be splitting up after this sem 'cos we'd be in our major courses of engineering! Sad much? My seniors in EBM (my course) have been telling me that first sem mates are the best mates you'd ever meet thru' out your poly life but I rly hope it isn't true....... Totally sound like my future mates wld be awful and stuff and I totally HOPE NOT. Not as awesome nvm just be gooooood :)

2011-09-04T05:00:00.001+08:00

Meet Emma the Schnauzer

I've always liked this breed esp. Dogs with moustache haha. I rmbr my sec1 or 2 bday present from Adeline, she gave me a mini plush schnauzer haha so cute!! I kept it in my closet :) Well, and it turned out that my Aunt got a grey schnauzer for a few years alr and recently, my uncle's wife also bought Little black Emma. She's 1 year old while the grey V-go is like maybe 6 years old? A weird name, V-go. Hmm~

2011-09-02T15:26:00.002+08:00

Camwhore

Ah lian pose haha and now then I realise. Im not, if you know me :))) Sometimes I think I look pretty, sometimes I look f**cking ugly. Aiya sian. I wish I was prettier. Must take care of my skin first ): SLEEP EARLIER LYDIA PHEE!! Or else all the pimples pops and will never go away. I envy those ppl w baby face and "pimples" which I wouldn't even consider them as "pimples". Srsly man some of my friends wld be like "eh I got pimple alr ):" Then when I see it, I'm like...... LOL. Idk why I can't see any pimples when I take pics.... Not like I photoshop? Idk how to... haha. Maybe my face is full of marks and small pimples that cannot be seen thru' the camera? Oh well.

2011-08-31T06:12:00.002+08:00

It's been almost two weeks since the end of exams and yep, sadness of "did freaking badly4exams" feeling kinda faded subconsciously. Have been having "fun" in a way, its happy. Boredom, in another way too. Well, Life. Can't be happy alltheway right?! I wish I would la. & If I could, I would :)

Last (mid) night, went Macs w a grp of friends frm BRD and we had nonsensical chats till quite late haha. & today, went Vivo w mum. After Vivo, went to meet bestie JinRen & JunWei for DimSum at Geylang. Don't feel very safe there, lucky I didnt wear my wedges or else more like a .......... WTF. Haha but yeah. After early "supper", went 2 Kallang macs to accompany JR to study. SRSLY he wasn't even studying, that idiot!! Esp when Marcus Chua came by and he got distracted. Tsktsk.

Oh ya ytd I also went threading. First time trying it. It was painful (quite) and it got me into tears haha. That explains why I look a little weird but nvmmm, GET USED TO IT COS IM ME. haha.

2011-08-29T04:00:00.000+08:00

Say hi to hotstuff :) Park Jaebeom, JayPark. He's damn cute sia. His body also very hot? But nah I'm not into bodies tho. Girls yes, guys no. hahahahaha. Oops. Pretty vexed these days but I shall not rant here. No mood to. Just feel pretty stuffed up. Sigh, c'mon cheer up!!!!!

2011-08-23T03:14:00.003+08:00

The Narcissist & KittyKatz

Hi, recently I totally seem like a Hello Kitty fan. Ahah. Not exactly! Mum went overseas & she got me the pink kitty head. Biggest soft toy I've so far. (I dont rly fancy them) I bought the smaller white kitty head the other time I went Macau. There copyrighted Sanrio lika cheap btw.

Did I mention that the Minnie mouse is like 1 yr older than me? Mum got it before she gave birth to me. I think its the one w most sentimental value. And, I dont rly get to keep soft toys back then, when I was young. (Maybe thats why I dont rly fancy them now) I'll only keep them when my mum allows me to. Omg did I somehow made my mum sound lika tyrant now? Okay la, sometimes.... HAHA. Oops. 1 more paper to go and sem break alr. Time flies. ZZZZ.

2011-08-18T05:14:00.001+08:00

My babes in class :))

CyrusTheBitch!!

My lovely brothers!!!

The front row kids~

Module completed- S&W(Sports & Wellness) Netball mates.

Geez I will miss my netball peeps. Just so you know, I'm having my exams on this Friday till 24th Aug. CFM PASS BY DAMN FAST ONE!!! Which means, it's just a step closer to the holidayyyyyyys~ hehe. But I'd be damn worried for my results, FOR SURE. ): I haven't been a good student this semester........ Actually have never been a good student anyw. Hah. Mass meet ups and shopping and pei family this holidays. Pre-occupied alr. Thus, I've decided not to work. Enjoy while it lasts :) For now, WISHMELUCK4EXAMS. Wishing everyone best of wishes too!! :)

2011-08-07T03:56:00.000+08:00

I dont know if I've spoilt the picture college but this is just to wish my newly "brought into" my less than 3!! He's an amateur tho. Just kidding!! Happy birthday dudeee, you're an awesome friend :)

2011-08-06T03:05:00.000+08:00

Have been pretty busy, thus, having no time to blog! Quite lz to upload pictures cos of the long wait. But there's always a way to keep track of me, which is thru' fb and twitter!!! I can never go MIA from the virtual world. It's almost like my second life. I think I'm getting acting too cute lately which might make some ppl irritated I guess haha. Oops? Hmmmm life's filled w lotsa' anticipation. What a way to train patience huh but not everyone's good at all. LIFE SUCKS AT TIMES!!! You have to agree :)

However, life rocks to have gr8 companions around you. That's like the best damn thing that you'd ever feel. Feeling loved, cared for and known for your existence. Haha k wtv i'm damn nonsensical. Nights!!!!!!

2011-07-13T21:18:00.002+08:00

Ever-changing.

"Marshmellow faceeeee"

Hi man. Life's kinda ironic at times. You're happy with how things are going lately but you're just not very happy over some other stuffs. It's not abt sweating the small stuffs tho. That'll simply make everything sound stupid instantly. Be contented I guess. Another thing is, I'm still not pushing myself hard enough. Really so sick of it. It gets worrying as time goes by. I'm just not determined enough. How do you people actually do all these? I'm impressed. Maybe its time to hit the library instead of just idling at home doing nothing at all. & when I say nothing, it rly means nothing. I'm really too good at idling. Too much.

2011-07-11T10:53:00.000+08:00

Mizah's 17

Celebration of Mizah's belated 17th bday last Sat. More pics up on fb! Had a great time catching up with everyone. Mostly from group "12<3" haha. LOVELY hehe.

2011-07-04T23:44:00.001+08:00

Gear up, Fear down.

Hello Monday, 4th of July. Fun in a way, tiring in two. A coursemate lectured me for getting an "F" for a module.... She was blunt but it was for my own good. Afterall, she didn't hafta' utter a single word at all since we're not rly v close. Acquainted, yes. Although it didn't rly feel nice at first but come to think of it, she was right. & she was just being nice. Haha, great to have acquaintances like her :)

2011-07-02T20:11:00.000+08:00

Oh how we love Fridays

Hi man! Today's a Saturday and I had a great day ytd :) (As you can see from all the pics abv) Quite happening ah haha. I wish everyday was like ytd tho. Sadly, happy moments don't last forever. Happy memories stays with us forever. :)

2011-06-29T02:15:00.006+08:00

Keeping Track

Better than having so many things in mind which we usually would end up forgetting, might as well jot it down and make it a point to convert the dos & wants into a list of immediate actions to be carried out. Sounds like a good idea right? I'll try my best, bestest. :)

1) Buck up in studies
-No more procrastinating, start doing tutorials and all practices given.
-Take a step at a time, and not just leave it to "fate". (Lz students shld get what I mean)
-Keep laziness at bay, no more letting it infect the whole.

2) Have sense of urgency
-Prioritise importance of matters.
-Keep track of time and punctuality.

3) Self discipline
-Do what should be done, stop what should have ceased to exist.
-More of actions, less of words.

4) Peace and Harmony
-No continuation of quarrels, pointless fights.

5) Healthy Living
-No more gaining of unnecessary weight put on by (excessive) snacking.
-Increase intake of water & fruits.
-Exercising & having fun. (FUN to keep up positive mindset)
-Don't dwell on useless "events".
-Sleep while I can.

Starting to sound stupid? END ALR LA DON'T JUDGE, let's prove one another wrong!!! 'Cos Adidas once said "Impossible is Nothing." and Nike told us to "Just do it." HAHA IT LINKS OKKKKKKK.

2011-06-28T00:33:00.003+08:00

Disgusted seeing disgusting face.

I think this will be the last time I'd be using my lousy Toshiba notebook's webcam to upload pics. My HP laptop's webcam was ALOT better than this I swear. This one contrast set too high but cannot alter changes wtf? But the sad thing was.... My HP laptop crashed on me! Afterwhich, I went to repair my HP laptop and passed it on to my laptop-less brother. I, then bought this Toshiba notebook, totally oblivious of the fact that its processor was damnnnnnnnn slow and lousy for my course's programmes and softwares to handle.

Lucky for me, my dad's notebook spoilt and he wants me to pass this on to him and get a lappy of my own haha. This time, I'm gna get an Apple MacBookPro from SCHOOL with 3 years warranty. And since its from SCHOOL, I suppose it won't die on me nor NOT meet the requirements of the specs for my Engineering course alr yes? I GLADLY HOPE SO.

2011-06-26T04:56:00.001+08:00

You know, I haven't been blogging and I haven't been taking much pics so yeah.... Boring~ So... I shall blog abt the rings and necklace I got from Fashion Hooks :) It's a cheap buy!!

I look retarded and shag. ): I need to lose weight..... My mum and bro have been saying I'm becoming more and more fleshy. Sigh sucks2beMe ): & actually, before I wanted to blog this post, I was quite happy and all but now, I'm feeling rather down. Nobody will understand what I'm gna go through. Even I, don't get it! However, I'm just gna tell myself that I WILL and MUST pull through.

I've wasted half a semester in NP. 20% from common tests, gone with the wind. 80% more to go. Someone once told me I shouldn't give up so easily 'cos I can do it. Why do I look down on myself so much? Just have to maintain my emotions and go ahead with life, as it is. I should have more faith.

The pics above are from my Toshiba notebook and I think they look kinda neutral, as in happy haha. Friends really play a big part in life.

I know I shouldn't be blogging this pic but I can't help but share this with everyone. Once I look at this, I'd laugh to myself unknowingly. CANT BE HELPED MAN. He's srsly damn funny right?! I hope he doesn't see this. Anw my blog's so dead already, no one would bother coming to this forlorn blog, right?! For those who came, TAKE A GOOD LOOK @ THIS HAHAHA!!!!

& now, I'm happy again :)

2011-06-20T05:19:00.000+08:00

Hey I'm blogging this pic just to semi-revive my blog. And I got this pic from AngelW Luv's recent blog post. She's one of my favourite girls too!!!!! :) So agree with you. Love you! You're the reason why I posted this post hehe ;)

2011-05-11T23:27:00.001+08:00

Officially. Thats right. I've grown alot fatter now. These pics were taken during the hols! Fml srsly how did I maintain my figure the other time ah?!!!!!!!! I feel like a bloody obesed pooh bear now. ): Big big tummy wtf? And I haven't been touching my wedges since schl started. Even tho I might be the shortest, still. Im used to it!!! Now Im just trying to lose weight so I'll be moreeeeeee confident in my attires. All is said, more is to be done. This applies to everything happening to me now. Okay la, I'm..... fine in a way I'm not so depressed alr. Guess we have got to look on the brighter side of life. Afterall, time flies like wind and memories fade with time.

Oh and looking at my longggggg hair the other time, I feel like I wna leave it long once again!! Now its middle length. Sometimes long hair is sickening, thats why I decided to chop it off till shoulder length the other time! I dont regret it cos I tried some curllllllllls I like! Natural enough. But my mates keep saying I look prettier before this. Kns. Maybe cos of hair and weight? Aiya, within months only so many things can change. This shows alot.... Not everything's set permanent for good. Cherish, treasure.

2011-05-09T22:47:00.001+08:00

I was damn sad then I became damn angry and now IM FFFFFFFFING PISSED OFF. But after seeing these pics, I feel damn retarded suddenly. That kinda feeling overwhelmed by...... mixed emotions.

I really hate how egoistic you can get at times. Im feeling so annoyed by everything now ok. Then now again, when I see all these pics, I rmbr what you said the other time when I wanted to take a pic w you and you irritatedly pushed me away....... Fannoying? You know? All these memories coming back bit by bit to haunt me. I fucking hate what Im in right now. Why????????? I dont think I was treated as rightfully as I shld be sometimes. I tried to be nice and it was got rejected. Then quarrels and everything. Repetition.

Then now, suddenly I feel that its good that we've ended it like that. At least we get to get away from all those shitty stuffs that I certainly abhor. For you? Idk. I dont wna care but I cant. 1 year 3 months. Like short but its long too. Long suspenses.... Fffffffffffffffffffffffuck.

2011-05-08T01:02:00.002+08:00

Sometimes... I do miss that presence I felt ages back.

For so long..... this is the first freaking time I'm seriously at loss of what to do. You know that kinda feeling when you only HAVE to choose one but you rly rly rly wna have both? Why can't people have "best of both worlds"? But true enough, giving in is a thing which needs alot alot alot of courage. Why courage? You think for yourself.

This part says follow your heart. The other says follow what's theorically right. But some may have proved you really wrong. 'Cos..... life isn't abt whats theorically right. No one cares about that. You know what's right? When everything goes smoothly and no crossing each other's path. That's right. Its really hard to think for the others ALL the time. I swear. Like now, Im just thinking from THIS point of view. But how many can actually get it?

Definitely not when one is in a state of anger.

2011-04-18T23:20:00.001+08:00

Hello! My lovely brothers :) Today im gna do a mega pic post ;) Okay la actually most of 'em can be seen on fb but THIS IS WHAT A BLOG IS FOR!!!! Just update for fun hehe. Okay I will talk as I go by.

Work w colleagues :) AWESOME SO FUN!!!! Love them to bits!!! and, they are all smartiepants! They're smart in a way la envy them haha. Just 1 or 2 years older than me? Haha. Had so much fun during work, thanks for crapping and working GREATLY w me ;) Be it the previous GUESS bazaar or recent one, everyone were awesome!!!!!! :))))))))

Everybody CFM recognise this place or else GO BANG WALL hahahaha. Picnic at Marina Barrage w sec schl mates!! It's been so long schling w you guys and you people are indeed the best ppl who're always by me . Classes and everything, woooohoooo love you guys max!!!!

I went Universal Studio w my LOVELY CLIQUE!!! <3 <3 <3 Love you guys man.. Im not gna say anything more cos you guys mean tooooooo much to me that words cant express how I feel towards you guys. Mizah, Adeline, Fion hehe and not forgetting ANGEL!!!!!!! (but ya you nvr go USS w me so put your name here like extra only) HAHA but I like!!! My girl clique always the awesomest ;) Guys clique also awesome la but not as awesome. Hehe.

Okay this is myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy NGEE ANN POLY EBM (same course) mates ;) Lovely lovely bunch of ppl buttttttt better not exclaim too much later skarly turn out to be like shyt how?!! HAHA TOUCH WOOD. No la, I believe the ppl there are as nice as me. 3 years would be a no problem communicating and getting along w you guys. IM SO SOCIABLE that I'll MAKE THINGS WORK i dont care!!!! hehe.

Okay that's all for this post. More like a dedication but to my BLOG. Been so long since I posted haha. So all these are my recent happenings :) More to come ok!!!! I suppose my forsaken blog wouldn't be as forsaken in future I hope? Hehe Nights!!!!!!

2011-03-28T06:33:00.000+08:00

Went Prawn fishing like few weeks back w Kryan, Kyran and Vu :) Well quite fun! And I realised there was a tactic haha :) Thru' this session, I still feel Kryan's brother is like more "xi xin" than him in some ways. Cos its like.... sometimes he'll just leave me there for nuts? And he doesn't help me in anything I do.... only once in a purple moon I guess.... but that's smths I dont like abt him Oh well.

Went out w Angel on a monday many wks back too. That freaking wedges platform heels made me walk around fareast barefooted. F*cking hurts like some...... omg idk how to express the indescribable pain-feel.

Okay this is just two days back when I went out w YenZhi and Adeline to Bugis. For the first time I'm like wearing 3 quarters haha. I always thought it don't rly look good on me but yeah.... trying out different looks nowadays (: And this flowery sheer Vintage-feel top I rly like it! However, I know alot of ppl won't like this kinda clothes and..... yeah, it doesnt rly look nice from here. My camera nt as awesome hahaaaaaa.

Haven't been taking pics lately cos left my cam w Angel absentmindedly but its alrighttttttttt. Sometimes I rly hate my camera for being so freaking lag. Nikon digital cams got so bad meh????? I think Im just suay la. Just so happen that this cam's faulty? Knnehhhhhh ):

2011-03-17T02:22:00.000+08:00

More to come

Have been meeting these people lately. And alot has happened lately. Yet again. I'm so tired. He's draining all of me.... Why am I so affected srsly. I rly wanna care less less less.. since he already did since idk when. Haha what a joke. If this was one year ago, I bet this kinda things wld nvr have happened. I guess you're right, I've changed. Changed to be more...... Mindful of wtv you're doing. I'm caring too much here. Dying.

2011-03-08T08:25:00.001+08:00

MUST WATCH!!!!

I watched this on SCV chl 255 but only has 2 eps per weekend. Stupid right? I didnt wanna wait till neck long so I chose to watch it the harddddddd way. Thru' the net! It was hard cos ah...... subtitles in chinese and its so hard to read and watch their expressions at the same time. Still love love loveeeee it! I'm not those kind who'll chiong dramas so badly but this is an exception. 16 episodes only anw, short and sweet show :}

First 4 eps you totally dont know the main "gist" of the show but towards the end super heartfelt heh <3

2011-03-07T08:10:00.000+08:00

Class BBQ~

KQ and me were the only brave ones to head to the centre! :d but srsly its not v high but IF it breaks, there goes out legs~

My legs look like throtters in the pic below ):

Went for my class BBQ on Sat. Well, we'll say half of 1/3 of the class but was still alright :) The usual group i mix pretty well with ^^ So sad that I'll be parting w everyone of them, gg into Np while they head into TP SP and NYP and SRJC. Aiya but Im sure my random sickness wld make us meet up within the year or the next hahaha. I'm gna blog more abt the previous outings since I've pics in my hands ^^

2011-02-27T01:32:00.001+08:00

Hello!! Today I had a girls' reunion @ Ade's house hehe. Missed them alot man! Before this everyone were so strangled by work & schl and Im glad that we finally met up today!!! <3

Ade prepared PASTA for dinner and I helped out while the other two slacked like some assssssssses! Feel so (A) out of a sudden HAHA

DINNER IS SERVED!

The brownie Mizah, Fion and Ade baked haha. I wasn't there cus I was late! :x heheeeeeeee But I did the frosting and decorating :D Okay fine... it doesn't look that good but the taste's AWESUMZ. It goes like.. "Good food look bad." HAHA FULL OF EXCUSES!

More pics up on FB!! :) :)

2011-02-23T02:09:00.001+08:00

问世间情为何物?

Hi dears! I shall dedicate this song to everyone in love. Love's a big word :)

2011-02-14T02:35:00.001+08:00

For tonight.... I've been kept in a big dillema but in the end, I still did it. I think I need time to get over it. ALOT of time...... I'm thinking in future, how? Everyone would think this is damn abrupt and sudden but I somehow dont quite agree w it. Do you all know abt the sadness I might be in too? Might sound like some heartless bitch or some childish kid typing here over the "R/S problem" but this is just me. You can't do anything abt it, cos its just me.......................... and you are just you, too. You do what you like and I do what I like too. That's human rights.

):

2011-02-13T18:20:00.000+08:00

So yep I know I haven't been blogging ever since..... But I REALLY really wanted to blog. Am serious! Just that I'm pretty lazy to use lappy to upload pics. Have been using the desktop to audi so yup! Only want to save my pics in my lappy and not on both sides. Ok so here's it!

So... I've been working before CNY and I was rlyyyyyy busy. But had hell fun w my colleagues & Adeline heh. Sales wasn't so good so we were slacking ALOT too LOL. You'll understand when you see the pics ;)

This pic below look like I'm some dead corpse? then Chester look like Auntie and Adeline look like JiangShi (Vampire) hor? hahahaahahaha

Then its CNY w these ppl (:

Karaoke!

Lastly it was ytd. Gg JJ's hse w bros, adeline and friends.

It may seem like im damn happening but I gathered the whole month thing... or maybe even MORE than a mth's thing for this post haha. Oh well. (:

2011-02-02T02:39:00.002+08:00

I'm always very pessimistic that I often choose to give it all up before everything gives up on me. What d'you think? How about you? Sigh it's yet another not-very-happy night afterall.

2011-01-24T03:28:00.001+08:00

LAST DAY OF WORK @ "GUESS" PARAGON!!!!

Happy and sad, both! Experience wise, its fantastic (: Although it's just a mere 2 weeks job? (I think) but working has been really hectic. Tired...... Anw my nose bled today ): Must be the heatiness in me zz. Hate to be like some mushy mushy clingy kinda girl but horrrrrrr, I miss Kryanwong now. Since school started, for him, we've only been meeting once or twice a week but its rather good. We get to spend quality time at least. (: A new year, a new beginning. Hopefully everything refreshes and we'll give our life a fresh start.

2011-01-20T03:01:00.000+08:00

Went KeQin's hse on Monday w Boon and Irfan and left around 7+. Took some last minute pictures and I was being pranked again! KeQin was wearing a "<<<< I'm with STUPID" spongebob and Patrick tee and yup, obviously they were trying to arrow it @ me! (You'll get it as soon as you see ALL the pics) Boon didn't take bus from the busstop we were at so there's no pictures of him awwwww.

(My thighs look so fat but let's just say it's this angle's fault! hehe)

The next day, I went to see a doctor @ Parkway Polyclinic. Just dno why I don't feel so well lately. Bought 1 top, 1 cardigan and had my haircut! Somehow regretted cutting it w/o layering but hair will grow!!!! Felt so much lighter but mum didn't like it cos she said it has no shape since it's not layered. Well, for today, I went VIVO w Grandma and mum. Bought quite alot of facial products and a "Guess" slippers+ belt. Omggggg have been spending money like idk what to say.

Tmrw gg back2work! And lastly, this is how my hair looks like with some 'in-curls' I made with a straightener. Does it look that bad? ):

2011-01-17T03:50:00.000+08:00

So... I've been working at Paragon and MBS(Marina Bay Sands) "Guess" stores lately, sleeping @ ungodly hours, gg out w mum & friends and gg Kryan's & Ah ma's hse for dinners. Oh! Not forgetting the collecting of results and choosing of schools+ courses. These are all the stuffs that have kept me all tied down! Overall, Happy tho (: Today went 'shopping' w mum @ Orchard and I bought a CKJ bag on offer! It's kinda big and suitable for schoolllllllllllllll. I wonder which schl & course I'd be posted to........

Anw! I'm gg KeQin's hse together w the "Super Seniors" I think. Hopefully I'd be able to meet Angel cos I haven't went out w them and actually met them except for the day of the collection of results in Broadrick -.-

3.48AM TIME FOR BED NIGHTS (:

2011-01-02T01:12:00.003+08:00

13 months of efforts dismissed just in 1 day.

Ytd went steamboat w colleagues after work. We didn't countdown but we watched the tv chl 5 countdown. He didn't even asked me out to countdown, and even went clubbing. Was disappointed tho I didn't speak up. All I asked for was just a "Baby wanna meet for countdown?" But no. This gave me a flashback to how sweet he was last year. Reminiscing the past doesn't help tho, it worsens everything.

Spammed prawns and everything w the girls (except Seksuan since she was a vegetarian) My countdown for 2011 this year's so unexpected but great anw. Spent it w new friends and lovely brothers. Wait..... but a tragedy happened after food. My tummy got so upset that I somehow became the "Wet-blanket" ): Quickly chionged the last train and taxi-ed home from Paya Lebar. To think I amazingly held on for so long ;)

Had the runs and slept after shower. Woke up halfway thru' bad sleep and........ VOMITTED HALF A BASIN. ): ): ): Then ya la, work today like zombified. Lucky for me, Evans placed me @ cashier which means no need for shoe sales (: Nicholas even helped buy porridge for dinner. Sometimes it's great knowing these people despite facing politics at times.

2010-12-31T01:05:00.000+08:00

Work has been partly fine yet partly filled w politics, but its okay..... Srsly I'm someone who rly cares abt others' opinionated judgement or thinking of me. Like...... I'm too eager to know how ppl think about me that its affecting my consciousness way too much. Is this smth to do w my ego? It's funny right? We hate being judged BUT we judge. Normal I guess? Just that I REALLY have to stop being over sensitive over some senseless stuffs. It's good in a way, or two! (: Curb my temper+emotions+usuage of vulgarities. Character improvement programme for myself hahaha

Actually before this, I was VERY VERY angry that I was on the verge of tears but got over it alr (: This is smth so amazing about anger. It's a monsterous devil in you that if you dont control it well, you'll lose your temper and scold crudely or even wanting to whack the person up rofllllllllllllllll. Then after you cool down? You'll start to realise..... eh? Why was I so angry over sucha small peanut matter? Not even an issue. & thereeeeee, you regret. AIYA calm down alr ofc say liddat right? Who don't know right?

I should stop being so uncouth and just stay calm........................... RELAC

2010-12-29T01:00:00.000+08:00

Did afternoon work shift at IMM mall for ytd and today. Quite fine w it but rly messy messy messy 'cos I'm handling the shoes section. Such events rly can make newbie staffs like me go bonkers. I'm serious. Serving customers have been rather fine... no ill-tempered ppl (: Should take pictures w my colleagues one day off peak hour hahaha. Should come IMM mall one day to see this Puma/ Adidas apparels/shoes event sales. Got many many other shop sales also. I wanted to go early tmrw to shop but I'm working full day shift tmrw! Sad but can earn more $$$ ;)

2010-12-27T01:58:00.000+08:00

Kryan's sis bday today. Upload today's pics again some day.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-25T03:38:00.000+08:00

Hey there christmas dudessssssssssss (: Christmas alr and I'm rather lucky that I've Kryan w me for Christmas this yr. Till so late, 4AM. Woah plus JR Marky(so unexpected) and Kyran. Someone say I flirt, woahhhhhh.

I've got lotsa' pictures in Kryan's DSLR and my camera hehe upload soon!!!

Last minute

2010-12-23T15:35:00.001+08:00

Hey! My day was not so bad ytd! Tried calling SOOOO many ppl out yet no one wanted to accompany me buy present (FOR MY BRO'S FRIEND ZZZZ) Luckily, Darren was so steady enough (: I was just merely asking him for fun since I alr got rejected by 101 ppl and it was alr so late (like 5pm?) , but yeah, GOTCHA'! Knowing him since we were pri 4 classmates, ytd was the first time we ever went out. Hahaha sweet!

Gna celebrate christmas w ade miz and many more @ his hse so yep, got him a christmas gift alr, hope he'll like it? 'cos thru' ytd's window shopping, I realised that he actually doesn't like much of his gifts previously. Either throw or... yeah. Pathetic lor. Buying gifts rly very hard cos we took the whole evening as well. Alright. For today, I'll be spending my time w Kryan. Supposingly w Mizah and Jinren too! But one has to attend wake and the other... I'm not so sure too. :/

Calm moments

2010-12-22T02:29:00.000+08:00

Made some warm milk and it somehow made me full and sleepy already. I have to believe now that I've experienced it myself. But no, not everyday.... I'll turn into the fattest girl for sure! Sometimes I wished my life was more happening. Having more steady friends who I can hang out w. I mean, not that my friends aren't steady... its just... not enough. I can never be satisfied w life huh? You too right? That's nature my friends, it certainly is humans' nature. Good night world, no more swollen eyes tmrw, definitely.

2010-12-21T02:05:00.000+08:00

Dear Irony,

Merely words would not be able to express how I rly feel right now. I'm feeling depressed tonight. & partly, I'm adding unduly worries into my somehow defeated mind. I'm demoralised by little little things which are minor and unchangeable? I mean..... things that cannot be changed anymore yet i'm still dwelling over all these. My results.....

I wonder what the future would be like. I wonder what my future would bring. I hate my excessive unnecessary nonsense mind that keeps worsening all the stupid stuffs. I hate being so unexpressive too. Confused......... Who would be there for me, literally?

Just relax........ tomorrow would be a better day, I think it would be..

2010-12-20T05:08:00.000+08:00

Somehow overspent this december. Regretting buying some stuffs but I've to keep in mind "Regrets are better left unspoken"!! Detest how life's actually so... contradicting. Or maybe its just the people who're contradicts themselves. Definitely a procrastinator as well. Never bringing these 2 far enough. I'm one example who has these two characteristics. Sometimes I rly hate myself for having so much to say. Naggy, in that case. I can't help it and I can't & won't change that. It's both good and bad at the same time. I should learn to accept who I rly am and who they rly are. Life's nvr a perfection and it's a give and take. Stop trying to change who you are. If they know you, they'll like you for who you are. I guess I'll go w that. (:

2010-12-19T06:16:00.000+08:00

Awfully hopefully

Let's just say I'm overly sensitive and you're literally opposite, definitely totally insensitive. Hell yes its true, even you agree w me. Not to proclaim anything just yet. I'm just... disappointed. Can I rightfully be? I'm sad and unhappy.... just am in every way. Love is blind, true enough. Now that love is recovering its sight, what should its people do now? What will happen in future can just present itself right before me now. I'm ready for it already. It's been dragging for far too long. You know, i know it too. You've said it for yourself. I've crashed to pieces. Bits and pieces. To some, this might be abrupt but not to us alright. Am I right to say that? Sometimes..... I rly hate facts and truths cos they tear everything apart. However, till the very end, everyone still has to face the harsh reality that god has made us learn to accept, eventually. I guess love has many kinds and we've to change all sorts of love we're giving, showing and treating.

2010-12-08T13:20:00.003+08:00

Brace up, Chin up, Face it

Everything has been pretty fine lately. Before that.... it was chaotic. Haha, glad that things have settled down for good (: (: I'm glad, you're glad. You smile, I smile :D I feel like looking for a job now that my 2weeks job has ended and..... Oh ya, I haven't clean up my hse ): SIAN........ Sickening, how I wish I've a maid now. It sure sucks to be me!

Upon everything, I'M STILL WORRIED FOR MY O'S. You know, even tho I kept saying "nvm, stay back only, retain 1 more year" but no, in my heart it doesn't.... Even if I get the just nice grades for Nursing, I'm still feeling... ): It sucks la. Being sandwiched in the middle. I'll definitely be affected by how people are gna judge me and stuffs. Family? Relatives? Friends? Oh shitzxcz. Better play and have FUN now than never. That's life i guess, everyone has got their turn and it doesn't exclude me. Oh wellllllllllllllllllllllllll face it! Brace up, Chin up.

2010-11-26T01:56:00.000+08:00

I secretly envy other gorgeous people who often steal lemonlights.

how would it be like?

2010-11-05T12:18:00.001+08:00

Let's just cross our fingers and let it subside w time. I'm not touchy and easily swayed by my emotions, right? The Lydia Phee you know? Heehee time to wake up. Slap me to realityyyyyyyy. I've faith (: hope tht everything wld turn back to norm. With all my kith and kins around, what's thr to be afraid of? Way to go!

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2010-11-01T22:03:00.001+08:00

Sobbing in the day

So tired right now. I'm not even done reading 1 chapter for geog! Forget about memorising. I need to just read thru' and thats it, sitting for the paper tmrw. I do like geography but it's not working anymore. How did I get 35/50 in the past? I've truly forgotten how I studied for it. Was really sad today and I spoked to Daryl? Rly random but yeah.. Felt as if it was the end of the world. Ending with humiliation and more humiliation. I really wouldnt want it to come true. Decided to work hard for F&N. Checked NYP's site and F&N can be counted as a "science" subject. I was relieved, rly rly rly relieved. Having to resit for O's for another year would be...... disastrous. Can't think of what I'll be facing.... And I've rly rly truly thought it through thoroughly! I REALLY wanted to enter Nursing! Idk why but I'm almost feeling desperate to get in. Not cause I knew I was gna do badly for O's but I really wanted to try, K not try. But MUST create a career path as a Nurse in the future. Dno what came into me or how I managed to get psycho-ed but for the first time I actually get this kinda strong determined feeling. I mean.... I've not been thinking of what course I wanted to take. Wanted JC, but nah, cmi. Kept thinking of getting into the medical industry, thats all. Oh well 12 more days. and another 3 more mths to results.

I think I'm strange cos I rly want to tunnel myself to the day of getting back O's results. Serious. Although I somewhat alr predicted what I'm gna see on that slip........ No regrets.

I think i'm gna get F9 for geog again..... ):

2010-10-19T20:17:00.000+08:00

They are people who made me grow emotionally and physically stronger eh!

Gg jogging in another hour. Feel like gg over to the swing haha. Idk why I can actually go jog alone but not study alone! I know righttttt alone sounds so lonely. Less than 1 wk to go and I'm feeling the ultimate fear building over time. I know I won't be able to make it to 1x and might even get 2x but I rly hope I wont hit the 2x pointer ): Hate it. I'd rly love to enter a JC but how can I make it there? Can I? Feeling that stupid churning feeling in my tummy, oh ya, BUTTERFLIES. Alright time to blast.

2010-10-19T01:00:00.001+08:00

现在我真的对你所说的每一句感到反感。为什么你会那么喜欢鸡蛋里挑骨头呢？感觉上，你好像很喜欢针对我。我知道你一向来都对每个人这样，尤其是对你比较要好的朋友。但，并且我今日不是你的女友，我都会这样想。因为从我认识你的第一天，你早已经是这种性格。虽然你这样的处事待人的方式已经不是一朝一夕的事，我却还不能适应。只能对自己笑着说，为什么我还不能接受你的一切。可能，这就是我。看不过眼每件事的我。My chinese sucks, so dont bother correcting me. Best still, dont bother reading. Im sick of all the critisism tht critics are giving me. Unless you meant well, or else F off.

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Lost.

2010-10-15T13:26:00.001+08:00

Always thought i've finally found someone who'll alws be thr for me. Someone who could stand by me, giving me support and acknowledges me as someone xtra-more special. Giving me surprises, doing little things to make me happy... i mean, everyone would love the feeling of being sheltered and protected right? That includes me. Afterall, no matter how different each of us are, we're alike, we're similar, we move towards the same direction. Now, i feel as if your direction has moved towards another perspective and it's no longer the same. Sometimes i feel as if im living alone, without the companionship from you. What's this?

And today, it's graduation day for all 2010 broadrick graduants. You have definitely provided me a place whr i cld grow and make many many many many friends and acquaintances. Wishing everyone all the best, including myself. No matter whr we'll go in future, we'll nvr forget somewhr back then, our broadrick secondary school. Somewhr we've left our prints. You guys certainly make me feel like its never the end of the world and to add sugar, spice and everything nice, i love you guys! <3

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2010-10-12T00:42:00.001+08:00

I think this blogger-droid is weird. How do I actually blog from here? Oh well, just have to make do w what I have. Y'know I cant wait for the time which I can finally attain total irresistable freedom? However, thr still are pros and cons. Im good at listing them out but actions speak louder than words. I may say this, but I do not meant or do that way. Maybe thats why we're known as girls. Actually, i've alot to do but laziness caught hold of me just in the nick of time (lol)

Apparently, i've got 2bad encounters today. I simply have nothing more than goodwill intentions! But... Hell knows why they were put to blame. Irritated. If i'd known, I wouldnt have rendered a helping hand. It's totally outrageous. Putting it simply, you guys are absolutely douche at times. Argh. It ruins the mood. And why is it that you're so coincidentally not here when I think I need you to be around? I think its maddening. Forget it, good night.

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2010-10-12T00:28:00.001+08:00

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2010-10-07T22:55:00.002+08:00

Love these ppl (alot missing actually) They're my lovelyyyyyyy classymates! They're the cutest ppl ever w their crapping and childish behaviors although it can be rather disturbing at times. Sigh, what would it be like if we were to separate after O's!!!!! Sad right? Would miss them loads. Oh well.

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting

2010-10-06T23:25:00.003+08:00

For the slightest thing

Likehellothere! I'm feeling really happy tonight. Since the start of the day, I was like that and i'm rly glad that I was. (Cos I didnt sleep in any lessons at all, even during geog lessons(; ) Was really really touched by this classmate of mine. So sweet, even though it was a "combined effort" shared with his sister. Still... yeah. He somehow brightened up my day after the many many many days of grumpy slouchy blablabla days. Guess friends and classmates srsly play a big part in my life. Without them, I realise my life isn't as wonderful as it is. This is smth money can't buy, that's for sure. Before this, I'd say Happiness is a choice. But, not anymore. (: It's not a choice, but a definite. I'm lovin' it totally. Thank you truly. Before all these had begun, I had a best best best guy friend too. But everything changed yet life still has to go on. Happy or sad, it continues..... Good night!

2010-10-05T19:53:00.002+08:00

Down memory lane

Hi i'm back to the forlorn space of my own. A place whr I can do whatever I can, say whatever I want. So... here I am. I wonder why I'd only come here or twitter to post things which are of no... use. I mean, does it even help solve things? And to contradict myself, should I even be bothering about all these stuffs that certainly affects my mood as a whole? Haha... Why do I think so much, making everything seem so complicated. Hate it. But its okay, everything returns to the normal state the next morning - The Lydia you all know of, the Lydia I'm rather proud of. Everything changes and that's a definite thing. Losing my stand just yet again. Just wanting to feel better. I think blogging really helps, a little. (:

2010-09-08T14:02:00.000+08:00

Can you help me as I'm starting to burn

Hi peeps! I thought I shld post. Went IT show last few days and bought a Nikon camera. Heehee happy! {: Tuition and tuition and tuition. Bye (:

2010-08-18T17:33:00.000+08:00

Oh darling I wished you were here

I feel at ease, now that I'm here. Somewhere I feel so much more comfortable. In a way, not being exposed to.... people. How sad to be saying this.. I shld be proud of myself for cheering up and not acting like its the end of the world. Nothing beats to be positive right. Yes. C'mon cheer up. I love the ppl around me cause they bring me happiness like never before. (: Thank you ppl I want to prove it to those who'd look down on me. I wanna turn this around and change disappointment to contentment, fufillment and satisfaction. Making mum and dad/ kith and kins proud of my achievement would be what I'll aim to achieve. Knowing that they'll not have high expectations of me only makes me feel even more guilty. Sorry, loving you from the deepest within my heart.

2010-08-17T19:09:00.001+08:00

I'm here right now solely because I'm feeling down. Apparently I feel that I'm lacking knowledge and I feel... inferior. However, in actual fact, I sure am.. Crapping, yakking away.. Why am I chatty in a way I don't make full use of my ability of being a little more out-spoken than the others? I don't think I've lost to anyone, cos before I can even make any comparisons with them, I'd have lost to myself. Krison was right.. I am insubstantial and I'm different from those ppl who are of better standards. I can't even hold a candle to the..........

Tomorrow spells nightmare for me. Dont bother to wish me any luck, cos this time, it's not gna work anymore. What is luck? It makes ppl go head over heels that they've forgotten how much effort they'd put in to get the results previously. Not simply just luck alone. From then on, they become complacent. That's the end of the story. This is it, here you go, the newly formulated beastly kinda douchebags. Making precarious assumptions is as good as not speaking. It'll only allow others to see thru' the flaws....

2010-08-10T17:23:00.000+08:00

Patriotic enough? Got dressed in red and white ytd. Went KW's hse. Think it'll be the last day we'll be meeting up and relaxing like some free souls. Sad but have to. (: Needa mark our priorities! Still not too late right.

Oh ya Saturday my family went Sentosa resort world for 1 night stay free. Hehe. 12 midnight gym and next morning swimming. Feels so good! Idk what overcame my laziness, suddenly so into exercising. But after I came back, ate like some Mother. Wtf. ): Anw, Boon Heng just showed me this trailer of "Vampires suck" HAHAHAHA Freaking funny. A comedy version of "Twilight". Premiering 18Aug. That's like a big no-no ): Oh well.

2010-08-02T20:10:00.001+08:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH KILL ME NOW OMG. I persist in giving schl a miss tmrw. This toothache has been bothering me for at least weeks. Thought it was gone but it came back to haunt me alive!!! It hurts like no mother. You wna try?!!!! Some kinda cavity or smth. I'm so gna have it extracted. But it's just 1/10 shaky. If it's gna be extracted, I'll be f-ing my life. Srsly. Forget it. The whole point abt this post is to divert my attention to whatever I cld convert my energy to. But it's total failure. Don't bother. No need to study, no need to do work alr. Imagine this MF pain is brought onto O's that period!!!! Awesome.

I wna watch this. Weekends special after the MF-ing tooth is gone. TILL THEN.

2010-08-01T20:41:00.003+08:00

I was browsing thru' my previous posts of this blog. I was feeling envious. Hahaha ya, w my own life previously. GEEZ, MY LIFE WAS SO CAREFREE BACK THEN. It was a totally havoc kinda' life. Sucks now. Can't even put into comparison with last time. What a douche bag I was in the past.

#%*#@%&%&@(^@^)(^*@)(^^*^&#@^@(*^)^)@)(%#I@%&^(U% #*)%&#@%)%*@)^@(&^^)(@^*@)^@(&U%)(@*#

Actually i've alot of incomplete works overloading. I'm overloaded and system is down currently Bb shall go to bed and wake up at 3 later hehee. <3

2010-07-29T19:07:00.000+08:00

2010-07-27T19:05:00.000+08:00

We are humans, so it's a definite thing that we go totally MAD over smth like love. Something about mortals.. Either SAD or Happy. For today, I'll go w happy. Goodbye. (:

2010-07-24T00:20:00.000+08:00

Went to LICK (Little Ice Cream Kafe) today w the girls and we had ice cream buffet (: Ate like there's no tmrw, got so sick of ice cream by the end of the buffet omg. That's all (: Enjoyed today so I'll say I'm contented. Hence, I conclude it's a happy day today.. (:

2010-07-21T22:26:00.002+08:00

I think in future, I'll be more prone to suffering from depression. I seem to spend more of my time getting stressed out, worried and on a constant panic about what needs to be done in the future, along with everything else. So unnecessary but I can't help it! I hope, and pray hard. Hopefully all these hoping & praying works 'cos I seem to depend on em' for ease. Sigh, this shouldnt be the way. Deeply breathe in and out!!!!!!! Cool down Lydia Phee!!!!

"In each day that passes by, we stand by and witness how our lives are being lived without the full happiness and satisfaction we crave and need."

Have to agree. It's as if life's out to torture the hell out of us. However, life isn't just about a single dolly. It's about living as a whole. Piecing everything together, getting the best piece of happiness we're able to receive. I shall hold on.. (L) I just found out that I love my classmates. They're my pillar of strength at times. Something that keeps me alive and kicking I guess. Never fail to smile upon seeing their faces. Maybe it's of a routine now. To smile whenever I see any of em'. They are special, cos I can never do the same to other people... not even my family.. Funny how things can be. Life..... Haha. Just laugh it off.

2010-07-20T19:50:00.002+08:00

Some pathetic pics I took when I was @ Marina Bay Sands Sky Garden. Fyi it was raining ): Not as nice as I thought it was. Overly exaggerated when I hear the people saying how wonderful it was. It was my lil cousin's bday that Sunday so yeah.. That was it. Woke up 11.15AM quickly rushed over t my ahma hse. Didn't get to have a nice shower and everything so it ended w a bad hair day. It's okay la, w family only hahaha. That afternoon we had lunch @ Tung Lok restaurant in VivoCity. Cakes and stuffs.

Haven't been blogging like how I used to.. Things have changed so much beyond imagination. Reality slapped me hard on the face. I'm just contradicting and contemplating. But we cant travel back to live in the past, we've to live towards a better tmrw!! Tomorrow is another day. Btw I notice I've lost plentiful of self-confidence.. Guess what's bothering me rly.

2010-07-20T16:59:00.000+08:00

Cut me some slack, sweeties. Spare me hun.

2010-07-15T21:03:00.002+08:00

I do...

Miss you.

2010-07-13T20:25:00.003+08:00

The feeling of being neglected is emptiness.

The feeling of being 'looked down' at is humiliation and sadness.

The feeling of having the thought but not the will is effortless.

The silent siren which signals the upcoming arrivals upon waiting.

The silence you never wanted keeps you cool and distant away.

The feeling which grew close to nothingness.

If all these were what makes someone grow stronger. I'll say, before you get stronger, the part where your brain is stored grows grass. However, if all the things people do meant well..... Directly or indirectly.. do you still sit there enduring and tolerating patiently. Waiting for the cows to come home to clear the growing grass.

What's up next?

2010-07-08T19:13:00.004+08:00

I hate this feeling. I am happy! Trying to be at my best so that nthg wld be able t affect my mood. So that I'll be able t weigh my priorities clearly and positively! However, that feeling just can't stop coming and going off just like that. That kinda feeling as if my heart's being.... wrenched and torn apart? Ah.... Idk hw t put it. I'm fine but........ Hate it that I'm so fail. Nthg seem t help. Ppl don't know cos I dont seem t look upset at all. Hideous huh. Sigh. Only having to pour parts of my frustrations and exasperation out here like some moron. It doesn't feel good at all.

Might be guilt and remorse and regrets that's slowly killing my ego...You know it's like a time bomb. Except for the fact that it restarts every after the clock strucks 12 and the bomb blows? The magnitude of the blow is harder than you can ever imgaine. It strucks your heart and rips you apart. To remind you of the worst things you've ever did. I guess it's better for me t uphold tht rather positive 'image' in schl. At least I wouldn't feel so bad. The sadness which's being held up by this positive attitude... haha (Y)

Cos that kinda' sadness isn't brief. It goes on and on within you until the black clouds have been tossed away. It's exceptionally foul. A heavy heart. I rly want to get rid of this.......... "It's over Lydia... No use being bothered by it, no use thinking of it since you can't do anything to change it anymore.You've still others' to handle and worry over" That's what has left me hanging on before I fall into the red cliff river of no return. Haha.....

I think I'm psychotic.

2010-07-06T17:16:00.001+08:00

I feel as if a truck has just rammed over me, leaving me completely flat on the concrete surface. I mean thts how my heart feels nw despite th 20mins walk back home. Who else to blame except myself. Faults. The ruins of me. Just a portion, a few more t go. 我好恨我自己！！！！！！！and thats wht ive found out today. Thrashed.

2010-07-01T22:34:00.002+08:00

Under undesired circumstances, you'll be pushed off limits. Even the frivolous might turn into a bright-lit filament. The bulb which wouldn't flash and flicker as much as before, anymore. How would you like that change. Depending on its provability. Would you turn scrupulous after you enter such circumstances? It's your call.

Is love ephemeral? Maybe we've entered the wrong entrance, to the disastrous realm of love. Love, we say is an affection. The affection you've proved to show in a time, that has now turned obsolete. It's a wonder, how some things could numb us that aspirins needn't come into the picture anymore. The thought of you has turned into an adversity I wouldn't have imagined some time before. A drastic change that has fell upon this neglected kid. In times of adversity, would you still turn back to take a look at your creation. The life you've messed up bigtime.

The only friend, for life.

2010-06-29T18:35:00.000+08:00

“They may forget what you said, but

they will never forget how you made them feel.”

How does it feel after a new semester has came for you. A brand new start........ but I'm still stuck behind, lagging 401375138591571501mps behind other ppl. Its demoralising to see and come across all these awkward situations. To actually see myself as a loser, already. I was too full of myself. It is not to my discretion no more. I've lost the power to control... to uphold the image which has been of me?? ................ Like a lost bird. I know my priorities, I must, by hook or by crook fulfill them. Like srsly!!!!!

I miss those smiles. Those rly true and vibrant one. For real. Sigh this isnt helping me at all. Still feeling so sucky. Ciao. (:

2010-06-23T02:39:00.001+08:00

New haircut. Somehow I like my bangs(at times) but the sides of my bangs like curl only ): Oh well. I envy those people w natural straight hair like Ashley!!! I haven't been blogging 'cos I thought there was no pt for me t blog since I had nthg in mind, hahaha. Hmwk left undone? A common sight. Laziness, procrastination kills. I need a study partner, a consistent one who can serve as a companion as well as a... time keeper. LOL. More t watch on me and study tgh. But I notice that there isn't anyone like that. Time restraints and stuffs. Sigh. Shall go watch Argentina and Greece's match. Kill time while waiting fr hair t dry and nails t dryyyy for next layer hehe. KK BB.

2010-06-08T18:24:00.001+08:00

“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect.

It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

2010-06-06T20:38:00.005+08:00

Sometimes I wonder..

What you do is a choice
What you say is a choice
Happiness is a choice
But what you receive isn't a choice

Cos they are things you might not be wanting afterall

2010-06-06T15:04:00.001+08:00

Lovely (':

2010-06-02T16:06:00.001+08:00

Feeling so much better. After last night, thanks babes. (L) You guys are all that I need. (: I will persevere!

Have been blog hopping, and weird it seems, but that kinda' joy you get thru' reading other people's online diary.. Haha, it's incredible? Enjoyable, even. (: Seeing people being happy with their lives makes you feel happy too. They say happiness is a choice. I guess it really is. Learning pts from the past few days, incredibly strange. Life..... Haha. Buckle onto your seat-belts, cos you'll never know what's up next. See you!

2010-06-01T20:02:00.000+08:00

I..... don't know what else I can do anymore. Just 4 more months marks the end of my secondary school life. I faintly feel like my world's spilting into two. I guess I should come back when I feel better.

2010-05-28T00:42:00.008+08:00

The next move

They say hope disappoints. I agree, yet disagree at the same time. Higher hopes, greater disappointment. This is so true but after going through a rough patch, I ask myself, what's hope when there's no heart. Hope for all you want 'cos reality still hits you hard. No point. For some things in life, you'll have to work towards your goal. Disappointed this time, definately. Also, time constraints are absolutely unavoidable. I am not going to cry anymore 'cos I'm not going to wallow in self pity. No more stupid stuffs.

I won't be showing nonchalant manners nor attitudes towards studies anymore.. I know I've infuriated Angel. (I know you care, I can feel it! You make the bestest mate, rly!) Talk is easy, action is hard. Shall prove it through actions. Conquering procrastination is first on my list. Nth beats disappointing your loved ones when they care and love you so so so much beyond words can express.

I can't afford to lose everything at this point of time. Not anymore. Turning points of life. Either good or bad, nth else. Believing in myself, I can do it. Failing doesn't totally define a failure. Every winner fails at doing smth 'cos eventually they fail at becoming a failure. But they're still winners! LOLLLL Do I get any point hereeee? Haha Nvm.. (:

WISH ME LUCK. I wont avoid resting and having fun still. (It's stupid) However, shall do 'em in moderation! Do not forsake me! I will do my best, I must! PROMISE (': & Promises should never be broken. Never.

For the sake of myself, and every single others, who eventually cares. Je t'adore, I love you. ♥

2010-05-23T17:19:00.000+08:00

Love is,

Like you and me. (: So.. I've spent my weekends away, not conducively. Sanity's ringing the warning siren while mind's dragging me away from reality, a bit by bit. I feel so fail. Maybe this might be the reason for me being so blur, absent-minded, retarded, idiotic and stupid? Keep forgetting to bring my stuffs!!! ): Ytd was w ade, today's w kryan. Sigh. Why am I like that? I hate myself.

Oh well...

To be continued on FB.. Cya!

2010-05-17T22:35:00.004+08:00

Seize the day

No one has claimed that it was nuts
We have ever been thru' cuts
However it seems, so distant away.
How could we ever find our way

Across the ocean, across the sea;
The times we've spent went past wind
All these moments flowed thru' mist
We sealed our lips with a kiss.